Good news: my 3-year check-up at MD Anderson went great, and we are more than thankful for another all-clear report. Obviously, each trip out there (this time it's been 4 months) brings a certain level of anxiety and fear of the what-ifs… and also somewhat brings back a time or two in life when we didn't get that good news we were hoping and praying for. As it has been said many times, only because we've been allowed to experience some not-so-good times/undesired outcomes we can appreciate even more the desired outcomes.
Sitting an entire day in that huge place, waiting on blood tests, drinking contrast material for the CTs, waiting on the MRIs… is a place to reflect on life, try to keep fear at bay, and try not to wish the day away. You're surrounded with hundreds of other people going through the same thing - some in the midst of their not-so-good times and some just like me, praying and hoping for another desired report. Sometimes we talk, sometimes we don't but eye contact there in the waiting room is always merciful, as this disease doesn't discriminate: there are distinguished officials, people of all races and nationalities, all very different, but all wearing the same scrubs and drinking the same tasty (not!) drink.
As I waited for my MRI, in the 'back solo waiting room' (the middle room where you sit alone until your turn), I heard a family down the hall, obviously an elderly gentleman in a wheelchair who was doing all of this for the first time. His daughter and son (I think) were with him, and the nurse or assistant was telling them about the MRI and the gentleman began to tell the nurse that he had lived a great life and although he was shocked by his recent diagnosis, he didn't want his life to be over yet…after a little more conversation, the nurse or assistant then said (probably violating all rules) "could I pray for you?" I did eavesdrop on their prayer and closed my eyes as he began to pray: "Dear heavenly Father - Your ways are better and higher than ours. You know us and our days before we are born. We know you are good… all the time and You do not allow us to go through anything before You allow us to endure it. And Lord, we know you told us we must walk through the trials and the valleys, not fly over, breeze past, jog or run through, but walk through. But you tell us You are with us… " Yes, Lord, what truth - and that nurse or assistant or angel was ministering to the gentleman in the wheelchair, and to me.
On to other news:
About 5 years ago, Mom began the process of praying through the idea of sharing her story… and as our family desperately wanted her to pen her journey, she wanted to make sure it was in God's timing. Actually, she was reluctant to begin for many reasons, most of which was talking about herself. God began to impress on her heart the need to share her story…and began the process of digging out her journals and opening those drawers of her mind to that painful, difficult, yet humbling journey through cancer that began in 2004.
After Silas and Avery were born, as she was compiling journals, cards, emails (there was hardly any social media then!), I had a desire to help put this on paper, to somehow try to help her make this into a book. Many afternoons when my babies were sleeping, I sat outside on our deck trying to allow my own mind to go back to that place… where Mom had cancer.
It's funny, no - it's not funny, it is truly amazing the way our Lord can work in and through our hearts to prepare us for things unimaginable. As I look back now, reliving (or trying my best to) that year from May 2004 until April 2005 provided me with more than a reminder of His miracles… it is a perfect demonstration of His sovereignty, His healing, His CONTROL.
There was and is no way I could have imagined how my life would be changed after September of 2011, when I heard those very same words: cancer. Praise God for His provision. Praise Him for His faithfulness and His peace. Praise Him for the HOPE… Praise Him for showing us a life worth living. Our prayer is that this book would be an encouragement to those facing battles seemingly formidable, and that it would be a resource for practical tips and suggestions for friends, family, and caregivers.
This is from the book jacket:
When one family member has cancer, the whole family has cancer.
This is not just another story of a family’s victory over cancer. The intent of the author sharing her story is to give practical suggestions to patients and their family and friends on how to help. Returning home from successful treatment in 2005, Darlene consistently receives calls, emails, and visits from people who are newly diagnosed and from the patient’s family and friends who want to know how to help their loved one. They ask her: What can I do? What should I say?
Included are suggestions for the patient on how to battle not only the disease but also the onslaught of fear and anxiety that accompanies a diagnosis such as cancer. Although every case of cancer is unique and each family is different, Darlene has found that there are some universal dos and don’ts for those who find themselves in this battle:
• Motivate yourself for the fight.
• Create ways others may join in.
• Learn how to encourage and help those battling cancer.
Ten years after being told she had inoperable cancer, Darlene
Gore is enjoying her vibrant life with her husband, children, and
grandchildren, having no evidence of disease. She relishes each day
with greener greens and bluer blues than before. Her hope is that her
story and the words of the book will be uplifting and encouraging to all
those facing difficult times.
“Your story shows how important it is to have faith, family support,
and the best medical team to focus on you as a person. Not all patients
are the same, and we have a long way to go, but you are a living
example of what’s possible.”
—Francisco J. Esteva, MD, PhD
Director, Breast Medical Oncology
New York University Langone Medical Center
“Darlene Gore and her daughter have written a poignant account of
their family’s struggle with cancer that completely touched and then
enveloped my heart. To those who have shared similar journeys with
cancer: you will be inspired, encouraged, and emotionally renewed as
you let their new book bless your life!”
—Sam Haskell, best-selling author of Promises I Made My Mother
“Darlene Gore’s story is a realistic and inspirational account of the
hope, disappointments, fears, side effects, and daily realities facedby cancer patients and their families. Darlene’s experience is also an
example that we must always do our utmost to provide cutting edge
care for our patients because we never know with certainty who will be
a long-term survivor.”
- Steven Curley, MD, FACS
Professor and Chief of Surgical Oncology
Baylor College of Medicine
The book is on Amazon in paperback, hardback, and Kindle versions, and Barnes and Noble as well as in local bookstores.
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